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For fourteenlines, who requested a Farscape ficlet with John/Aeryn.

Title: The Botany of Good and Evil
Author: voleuse
Fandom: Farscape
Pairing: John/Aeryn
Rating: G
Disclaimer: Not mine.
Summary: In our innocence we thought it was only landscape we were seeing from the window.
Notes: Set after The Peacekeeper Wars

John didn't panic until the DRD offered to inject the baby with translator microbes. He'd been doing pretty well until that point, what with the alien germs and the alien food and the alien mother of his child. But a robot bearing a needle filled with tiny alien linguists was too much, and that was why Aeryn found him and the baby, four arns later, hiding in one of Moya's upper corridors.

Aeryn folded her arms and watched him, still holding the baby, skip over a line of anxious DRDs. "Every Sebacean baby is injected with microbes after birth."

"Yeah, right," John grunted. "That explains a lot about Sebaceans."

"We should have had this done weekens ago," she said. John clutched the baby and scowled. "The microbes aren't harmful. They haven't harmed you."

"But my brain was cooked and done by the time I got injected." He paused to consider the idea. "Maybe they're one of the reasons I went crazy that one time."

Aeryn raised her eyebrows and didn't comment.

"Besides," he continued. "Our kid is smart. He can learn languages the hooked on phonics way."

"All of them."

"Every single one of them."

"John," Aeryn said, "we're speaking different languages right now. Pilot is speaking a different language. Chiana and Rygel both speak different languages."

"Maybe he's a genius." John kissed the baby's head.

Aeryn sighed. "Pilot has updated the database with a genetic work-up of the baby."

"Like a genome?" John tilted his head. "Can we use it to--"

"Extrapolate how the microbes might effect the baby?" Aeryn nodded. "Would you like to see?"

"Yeah." John relaxed, then handed the baby into Aeryn's open arms.

Aeryn stroked little D'Argo's head. "You realize, John, you'll have to change the baby's diapers for the next monen."

John kissed her on the temple. "Already planned on it."

And they laughed.


A/N: Title and summary adapted from Chana Kronfield's The School Where I Studied.



( 7 comments — Leave a comment )
Jan. 3rd, 2008 04:12 am (UTC)
My but they are cute. <3
Jan. 3rd, 2008 04:26 am (UTC)
Aww, I miss those two. That is about the cutest thing ever though. Of all the things most new dads have to freak out about, alien microbes ain't one of them, unless you're John Chrichton. :D
Jan. 3rd, 2008 04:33 am (UTC)
Hee! Poor John. Poor Aeryn! Hee.
Jan. 3rd, 2008 04:46 am (UTC)
The line about John's brain being fully cooked before he was injected with the microbes was just perfect.
Jan. 4th, 2008 11:57 pm (UTC)
I really like this one:

you had me from the opening - really brought me in.

I don't know about comedic-sarcastic-dryness (I really don't know what it is called: Besides," he continued. "Our kid is smart. He can learn languages the hooked on phonics way; I don't know about this.
Jan. 6th, 2008 03:56 am (UTC)
I really enjoyed this.

"Maybe he's a genius." John kissed the baby's head.

Aeryn sighed.

Hee. I love Aeryn's pragmatism here.
Jun. 23rd, 2009 04:09 pm (UTC)
I giggled and giggled while reading this. My cousins are looking at me like I'm crazy, but this was so in character and just, oh, my John and Aeryn. I loved this. :)
( 7 comments — Leave a comment )

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